Mother's Day

So this morning I was laying in bed hitting my snooze button a million times before I decided to get out of bed and get ready for the work day. I was looking at facebook on my phone and was reading alot of the mother's day wishes that were posted. Mother's day has always been a sad kind of day for me. Loosing my mom when I was only 8 years old and growing up with a step mom that I wasn't all that close with. Yesterday I was reading all the post and seeing all the pictures that my friends would post and deep down it made me feel even more sad till I saw what my best friend Ashley posted on facebook. What she wrote was exactly how I was feeling and I knew she knew how I was feeling too. We both lost our mother's, Ashley when she was just a new born and myself when I was kid. But we still share that hurt and loss with one another. I know deep down in my heart that is why I want to be a mom so badly. I want to share that love that I never ever had with my mom. I want to give my child everything I didn't have when I was younger, plus more! I don't want to spend another Mother's Day sad. I was really hoping that I was pregnant but mother nature decided to great me this morning. :/ I know when the time is right it will happen, and I know I will just need to be patient.

Here are the kind and wise word's that Ashley posted yesterday....love her!

"Mother's Day used to be kind of a sad day for me. I realize now that I was focusing too much on what I didn't have, since my mom passed away when I was 2 wks old. I just felt like this important piece of my life was missing. As I grow older though, it has become a much more happy day for me. I am so thankful that my mom is a part of me, and that I have had the best and most protective angel. I have had so many wonderful women in my life who cared for me and taught me, much like a mother does--such a blessing. Happy Mothers day to all of the moms and moms to be out there, and thank you to the ladies who took care of me."

So this morning when I was laying in bed I came across this one post a girl that graduated a year before me. And it was a picture of her and her mom when she was just a little kind. She had a dress up wedding vail on and her and her mom looked so happy together. The next picture was her all grown up on her wedding day with her and her mom both smiling at each other. You could see the love for each other in that picture. Then I started bursting out in tears....I can't wait for that day when I can actually have that!

I know this is a bit of a sad post but I wanted write down how I was feeling at the moment.